Halloween, et cetera

I have become a deeply boring person who does nothing but works and writes and works and writes and works and works and works and then—MORE FREQUENTLY THAN I WOULD LIKE, i.e. never—whisks their puppy to the puppy ER at 4 pm on a Wednesday because he STOLE MOM'S WITE-OUT TAPE in the like 0.07 SECONDS it was even remotely in reach and then SHATTERED THE DISPENSER and MAYBE ATE SOME SHARP BITS OF PLASTIC and ALSO MAYBE ATE SOME TAPE and ALSO NOW YOU HAVE TO CALL ANIMAL POISON CONTROL and then he gets ALL THE LOVE from the EMERGENCY VET and also PEOPLE FOOD, because the vet said to give him half a slice of bread with his food with every meal for a couple days, just to help keep things moving along, so he is SO PROUD OF HIMSELF IT CANNOT BE CONTAINED; but—

Well. He's perfectly fine, even if he doesn't have the sense God gave a radish, so: no harm no foul except for the like missed 2 hours of work for both moms and also TERROR and ANXIETY and SEVERAL HUNDRED DOLLARS; and now it's Halloween, which means, I'm sure, that what you REALLY want is: a whole bunch of pictures of a tiny dog who is also kind of a little shit vamping in his unicorn hoodie—

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Since you can't see it in the pics, his hoodie lights up. It also says "I'm not weird, I'm a unicorn!" which is, as Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.breathedout has pointed out, patently false, because he is clearly both weird and a unicorn.

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